Suicide [...and all the emotions that come with it]

Suicide, or the taking of one's life, is a complicated issue for me.

On the one hand, one has to accept that a person's life is his/her own to do as he/she desires - even if this means to end it.

On the other hand, one has to ask what is the basis (reason) for this action.
Some may state that an action that results in increased suffering (of oneself and others) is
wrong;
though if the action results in decreased suffering (of oneself and others), it can be right.

Suicide, as another author [read this first] put it eloquently, is a reaction of an individual who suffers from a pain that he/she is no longer able to endure usually as a result of poor/limited coping skills.
There are two suggestions by this author: (1) reduce the pain and/or (2) expand one's repertoire of skills for coping with pain.

Once a rather emotionally labile person myself, I believe I grasp an understanding of unbearable pain. Pain so vivid you feel it oozing from your very pores - that you would do anything to make it stop. And, for a moment, I would entertain the idea that death was the only way it would end. However, I always felt I should give life one more chance. Each time, it was like looking life in the eye and saying, "one more... just one more."

Then, I lost a friend to suicide. (Funny how I make it sound like suicide was the cause of her death, and not that she chose to die.) That pain was unimaginable. I was consumed with guilt (anger directed towards myself) - she would come to me and share her woe, but how could I not have foreseen this? Eventually, I have come to terms with her death and accepted this reality. I have also come to accept that I did all that I was able to do given the circumstances. Yet, every time I am reminded of that moment in time, there is an ache - an overall sensation throughout my body rifled with dull pain.

What's the point of this post...? There is none.